John Farley Klose gave me a good reminder in his last comment!!!

i banter with frustration. Seriously i don't think i know how to manipulate-- i see people do it all the time, ( at times i honestly envey those people, but only at their confidence, and well every ones ability to spell!) i Q how they can actually acheive their goal, let alone morally justify it. don't misunderstand me i don't want to actaully be one of those people i find vain, conceeded, and self serving.- i just know that since early child hood i've struggled with and sense of confidence. it's both a weakness, and a Gift. in most it produces pride, yet in some it produce pure authority. i believe the manipulator is one who is in the shadows of pride.-- i actually am fasinated with those who command authority-- yeah i'm a nut case!!
i now know my frustration is disapointment, but it's falls back to my previous post about being In Christ's marvelous light. it's just a turn of the head, or a side step that you find your self peerring into the shadows, when in fact the process of salvation has you you in Him, in His light.

that is the same with our students. i've been very disapointed esp with our student council. I know that possibly i've set the student council up on a high pedistal- expectting more, and disapointted at them, when in fact they need to learn to do a 180 instead of a 90- they themselves have steeped into their own shadows, and haven't completly turned their eyes around.
they know no other way, the church knows no other way, hence i find the roots of my frustration. i'm frustrasted , because i'm trying to help God along- i know better, yet look , hear i am Hello I'm Andy Mr dumb butt, who has been stepping in front of his Master.